Leveling Up in 2020 – Disconnecting to Stay Connected

While this article was originally intended as a New Year’s newsletter, it turned into something much more (personal) for me and I hope it resonates with you too. While a long read, it is great food for thought and reading time well spent as we enter the New Year! I’d love to hear your thoughts on how you choose to interact with social media.

This article has been updated and re-posted as a blog on February 26, 2020. Three months into my social scroll hiatus.

TAKING A BREAK

I made a conscious decision to stay off the social side of social media back in November 2019. I would no longer go to scroll news feeds, read posts, comment, etc. just go on to conduct my business and hop off. These platforms have been so ingrained into our lives that many businesses can only be reached through social media. If you really think about how quickly social media became relevant and even necessary, it is surprising and scary.

WHY WOULD YOU DO THAT???

I had had several very hard emotional hits throughout the past year and really needed to press the pause button on life. I had lost not one, but two immediate family members; a father and a sister. I lost my dog who I had since she was 8 weeks old. And, with great sadness I let go of several friends I recognized as not as invested in the friendship as I was, and it was time to let them go.

Image by Gerd Altmann pixabay.com

I needed space to process, reflect on and identify and let go of all these things I had no control over, and instead focus on what I could control or change. I knew from my previous experience with burnout that I needed to get into my imaginary helicopter, travel up to 5,000 feet above and look at all the situations that were impacting me from as many angles as possible. As they say, you cannot see the forest through the trees and a virtual helicopter is my way of seeing the forest from above, so to speak. I knew I needed to interact with what I did have control over differently, so I could avoid burnout and continue moving forward again.

With all these hits and the holidays coming I certainly wasn’t feeling festive or social. I also know I am prone to getting blue around this time of year, so this pause and turn inward was extra important to my self-care this year.

What brought me to believe staying off the social side of social media would be a beneficial change?

I didn’t, but I suspected it would. This was something I had a choice in and could control. I realized that every time I’d close a social media app, I would say to myself, “well that’s 30 minutes of my life I can’t get back”. Stepping back from it felt like a quick and easy way to remove that icky feeling I had every time I signed off. It was draining my energy.

Since November 22, the day my sister passed, I have not once looked at the social scroll of social media. I still have a Facebook account but I just use it to visit businesses or get information on events. I’m still on messenger and of course I have an Instagram account (rather my dog does). I’ve a twitter account too however the only thing I ever post there are marriage proposals to Elon Musk (kidding but maybe I should) so I’m staying ‘connected’ just enough to be reachable through all channels.

LESSON LEARNED

This break was good for me.

I work from home and absolutely found myself to be more productive very quickly. I was less distracted and taking no ‘social’ breaks to scroll. I was listening to more podcasts and noticed conversations with others were richer. I retained more details of these conversations than I did before. I was tuning into other people’s body language better. My memory improved. Lastly, even though I was getting more done in a day than I was before, I seemed to have more free time.

I told myself I would go back to social media on January 7, 2020. I figured the holidays would be over and I could get back to business as usual and simply slide back into the social side. I wrote this article on January 15 and it is now February 26, and I still haven’t returned to the social scroll, and I’ll tell you why.

WHAT’S YOUR WORD?

Every year for the New Year I choose a word to either add to, remove from, or live by instead of a resolution. I don’t believe resolutions are any more achievable than dreams but that’s for another rant. I get to choose how to interact with the word anyway I feel works for me.

For instance, several years ago I chose the word hate (I cringe even writing the word). I made a conscious decision to remove it from my vocabulary completely. Instead of saying it, I would say “I can’t stand that”. Once in the habit of not using the word I became hyper aware how often others used it and it began to have an actual physical effect on me, like rocks in my belly. Crazy right?

I’m great fun at parties now when you use that word in conversation with me. It becomes a topic of discussion and it always goes down a rabbit hole for everyone in the dialogue. Each time this happens, moving forward, the next time I run into that person they always share how they are more conscientious of using that word too.

LEVEL UP

This year I chose two words instead of one, and I am extremely excited about them. And I have my social scroll pause to thank for this year’s winning word(s). As a high achiever who has gone through burnout, and with the year I just had, this provides the absolute perfect tone for my 2020. I’ve chosen

How do I intend to use it moving forward?

I’m going to Level Up my listening skills and make sure I am really understanding what the person in front of me is saying.

I’m going to Level Up how, and who with, I conduct business.

I’m going to Level Up my relationships spending time only with those who also invest and avoiding those who don’t.

I’m going to Level Up my awareness of those around me and if I hear something or see something, I will say something.

And I’m going to Level Up my circle of influence.

NOT GOING BACK

The whole point of my word each year is to create manageable change, growth and forward movement in my life each year. And, if I truly plan to Level Up in 2020, then staying off the social scroll is going to be a part of it. Leveling Up, and everything I am committing myself to, is based on interacting in the real world, not a virtual world, and this is something that will contribute to real change for me.

There absolutely is great value in social media. It makes it easier than ever to stay in touch with friends and loved ones from around the world, yet there is a good-sized chunk of bad about it too. As much as it is meant to bring us together it is also pushing us apart. These platforms allow some to live in a false reality, while others behave in inappropriate ways they never would have before in the real world. Yes, social media truly has changed us – and is now ingrained – into our lives.

So I am going to continue and stay off the social scroll in 2020. My attention will be focused on Leveling Up. These last 7 weeks (now 3 months!) have had a huge impact on me, and it will be interesting to see the impact of staying off for the entire year will have on my life and business. I’m confident it will be huge!

GIVE IT A GO

What about you? Feeling motivated to Level Up yourself and do something different in 2020? Are you going into the New Year full of zest or simply exhausted from ending 2019? Unsure how or where to start? If you’re saying “YES! I’m ready to Level Up too but I need some help getting started, then let’s take 30 minutes to speak ON MY DIME

ABOUT RACHELLE

Hi I’m Rachelle Stone. I was a 25+ year veteran of the Meeting & Convention Industry who, in 2014 left to transition to full time Consulting & Executive Coaching after my own personal implosion (yes, I burned out!). I now guide stressed out business owners and executives through the strategic steps needed to breakthrough plateaus and glass ceilings, accelerate their growth trajectory, increase profits, dominate in their market and reach their goals WITHOUT burning out.

BEFORE YOU GO

Want to stay in touch? You can join my mailing list here. I send one monthly newsletter and post one blog a month only – who has time for anything more? We are all busy!! Easy consumption on your part and NO SPAMMING ever.

Want to learn more about staying on top without burning out as a high performer? Request membership in my private the Fork in the Road community on Facebook. Here you’ll find useful tips, inspiration, a safe place to ask questions about burnout and monthly group coaching along with early bird discounts to upcoming Life In Balance retreats for high performers (coming soon).

Are you a high performer that can’t say no and are fearing burnout? I love to coach high performers through the process of learning how to set boundaries and navigate the challenges of being a high achiever. Coaching provides you with an outside perspective, someone to hold you accountable to your goals and gets you to the finish line quicker all while advocating for you to succeed. Let’s chat for 30 minutes on my dime and see if I am the right match to support you in your current journey.

Did you find some useful gems in this? Let me know your thoughts by sending me a message at rachelle@rstoneconsulting.com

And if you (or someone you know & love) are anything like I was and would rather be more like what I have become – someone who wants to do great things in your career while still loving life – I invite you to hop on over to my website and take a look around. There’s a really cool and quick assessment you can pick up for FREE which will help you determine your current state of capacity and balance right on the home page. Then let’s stay in touch!